Love makes fools of us all

I should not make rash decisions when I havent taken my drugs lol It goes to show that they actually work. Two hours ago I was a mess. Im ok now though, sigh

Sunday sunday sunday, sigh, I dunno what I want lol I cancelled with kyle then I took it back. My one fear is, that I hold onto the friendship with him and then she will go back. And I lose it again. Its my biggest fear. and it will hurt again, which is where I dont want to be. But at this point in time I want his friendship more then ever. :( I like having the talks on the phone, even if it is 1am in the morn :) He's really my only friend and the only person that gets me. I would like to see him and have a coffee, see if I cant make him smile :) or even just to say goodbye.

I have this extreme pain in my left side of my stomach or hip every time I breath in heavy it hurts worse. its really weird and really painful. hopefully its gone tomorrow. If not Im off to the docs, the problem is most of the docs here are not taking on new patience. Stupid really.

Today was a really boring day and tonight is not much better. nothin on tv, but I have some movies that kyle gave me to watch however my dvd player is fucked. sigh. one thing after another. I need some good luck, can someone send some this way PLEASE!